Possibly-Better-Off Missed Connections [Reader Services]

It’s finally warming up here in New York, which we assumed would mean that the number of Cultural Missed Connections would be off the charts this week. Not so. It seems that most of you crazy kids run straight for the park the moment temperatures hit 80. Lucky for us, a few culture vultures eschewed the sunlight for the theatre, live shows, and the Tribeca Film Festival. Bless their pale, lonely hearts. Our favorite MCs after the jump.

“telegram for Mr. Banks” theatre ensemble cutie – m4m – 27 (42nd theatre)

You were in the ensemble cast of a b’way show that I saw Sunday at the 6:30 show. I sat in the box on your left. You helped the lead down from a riser in the super number. You were so cute. I’d love to have coffee and pick your brain about life on stage. Did you notice me noticing you? I had a beard. Xox
We love beards. Not as much as the Hipster Grifter, but a lot.

Alex P. Keaton – m4m – 25

You were very tall, built. and had an Alex P. Keaton t-shirt at the Eagle. We spoke briefly, but I didn’t get your number. Tell me what I was wearing.

+5 points for referencing Family Ties. -5 points for being gay and channeling Alex P. Keaton.

Fitzgerald on an uptown A – m4w (West Village)

you’re the only girl I’ve seen for a very long time that actually did look like something blooming.

Don’t get snowed by this over-the-top compliment. Our gut tells us that this guy would probably be torture to date. Lots of scribbling notes in his Moleskine.

Tribeca Film Festival – Don McKay today – m4m (East Village)

You were sitting behind me at the screening of DON McKAY today at the Tribeca Film Festival. I think maybe you were with your mom, not sure? We acknowledged each other briefly when I turned around to look for my friends. Anyway, you’re cute.

This reminds of the Will and Grace where Will’s mom shows up at his gym. Not attractive.

Cute girl at the Kevin Devine concert at the Bowery? – 20 (Bowery Ballroom)

So I was at the kevin devine concert on the 24th. And I saw a really adorable girl there. You were in a group I think. Maybe you just met them there? Brown hair. I think your shirt was brown too but I couldn’t really tell with the lights and everything. I have short brown hair and was wearing a black t-shirt, grey hoodie, black jacket and jeans. Let me know if you were there I guess? Cheers, Jake

Way too many question marks Jake. Women like assertive. Own your missed connection.

New York Times Cafeteria on Friday 12:30 – w4m – 25 (Midtown West)

I was walking down the street (42nd?) and you were sitting in the cafeteria across the table from two girls about your age (mid 20s). You looked bored. You sat back in your chair, yawned, and looked my way. I caught a glimpse of your blue eyes and imagined the stories you were working on. We made eye contact for about two seconds and then I went on my way. If you are reading this, I just want you to know, you are a gorgeous man.

This is probably the closest we’ll ever get to the NYT caf. Ah well.