We all know American Idol runner-up Adam Lambert’s stance on sexuality (it’s not an issue!), but what else does the above tongue-wagger in this photo have to say for himself? In this, the inaugural edition of For the Record, we invite you to litter our comments section with captions, New Yorker-style witticisms, LolCatz quips, and the literary equivalent of Perez Hilton penises. So, go to it folks: what exactly is Lambert saying in this image?