Monopoly is a
horrible board game that people are rumored to like. We’ve never met any of them, but apparently Monopoly has fans because it’s still extant. Now the makers of the evil and complicated board game have finally given the public a real reason to buy it: there’s real money being placed in 80 Monopoly sets, in celebration of the game’s 80th anniversary — but, sorry world, Rich Uncle Pennybags is only sharing the contents of his titular bags with the French.
Another horrible thing: the gym. The gym is technically good for you if you want to be healthy and fit and feel good about yourself, but it ultimately wastes so much time that could otherwise be spent taking selfies and binge-watching Netflix. Rejoice, for there is finally a place — aptly named #@THEGYM — for us to assuage the guilt of not owning a gym membership while continuing to drown ourselves in Netflix.
Twitter can be a horrible place if you’re a celebrity. It’s pretty easy to hurl abuse at people without consequence, since you will never ever meet these people in the real world. Jimmy Kimmel aired his second round of Mean Tweets – Music Edition, and hopefully the cringe-worthy (but still pretty funny) experience will remind us all that we should have way better things to do than spinelessly attacking musicians (or anyone, really) from within the safe spaces of our homes. Instead, spend your time spinelessly attacking musicians (or anyone, really) at #@THEGYM.
Let’s end with something awesome that another late night TV host named Jimmy brought about: Jimmy Fallon followed up his incredible lip-sync battle between Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart with an awesome mash-up of Brian Williams rapping “Who Am I (What’s My Name)?” This isn’t the first or second, but the third time Williams’ broadcasts have been mashed up to Snoop Dogg; though they clearly make quite a dynamic team, the two, unfortunately, will not be performing at the Grammys together.