There’s product placement. And then there’s product placement. As viewers, we understand that television is a business, but that doesn’t stop us from wanting to lose ourselves in the illusion of a more glamorous and entertaining fantasy — which is why advertisements that are inelegantly shoved into a TV show’s plot can be a little jarring. Naturally, a company that throws money at a television series in oversized novelty check amounts deserves a shout out now and then. But some of the episodes we’ve rounded up below appear to have been wholly written by their sponsors.

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1. According to the terms of a real estate agreement that’s currently in the works, The Metropolitan Museum of Art will take over the Whitney Museum of American Art’s Marcel Breuer-designed building in 2015, when the Whitney opens its new museum downtown, for a minimum of eight years. [via NYT]

2. In case you missed South Park’s hilarious spoof on the Royal Wedding last night, here it is: “Royal Pudding.”

3. Gwyneth Paltrow announced yesterday on GOOP that she’s growing salvia in her herb garden, and everyone is freaking out, even though she probably means salvia officinalis, a common sage used for cooking, and not salvia divinorum, Miley Cyrus’ hallucinogenic of choice. [via NYDN]

4. Some more updates from the network upfronts: NBC has renewed Chuck for another season; CBS is rumored to be holding on to most of its shows, as Two and a Half Men faces an uncertain future; The CW is likely to be bringing back both One Tree Hill and Nikita; and ABC is almost sure to renew Body of Proof, the network’s highest-rated new drama of the season. [via Deadline]

5. According to the Daily Mirror, so take this with a grain of salt, Quentin Tarantino is hoping to cast Lady Gaga in his next film, which made perfect sense to us until we remembered that it’s meant to be a Western… [via NME]

Bonus link: Meet the Woman Behind Bettie Page

The folks at TV Squad are killing it this Valentine’s Day. First, they brought us a wonderful montage of televisual kisses. And today, they’re helping us find our true TV love, with a handy flowchart. So, ladies: Are you a Chuck Bartowski kind of girl, or is Tim Riggins more your style? Gay dudes, is Kurt Hummel your one and only, or would rather share a blood feast with Russell Edgington? Please, someone, make a version for the straight guys and lesbians ASAP. But meanwhile, we’re happy to gloat over getting Don Draper.

1. The Cure have launched a new site, thecuredisintegration.com, which features videos, demos, liner notes, and two new songs: “Tuned Out on RTV5″ and “Fuknnotfunk.” [via 24Bit]
2. What the possible cancellation of Law & Order could mean for New York’s economy. [via WSJ]
3. Thirty-one years ago today, Kate Bush played the final show of her first and only tour. Ever wonder what happened? [via Guardian]
4. Exciting news for TV geeks: Both NBC’s Chuck and ABC’s V have been renewed for next season. [via THR]
5. Do we really have Sandra Bullock to thank for the Betty White movement? [via The Wrap]

Bonus link: Memorable character deaths

Today at Flavorpill, we learned 50 facts about the 50 United States. We loved “Shoes,” the new song that art punk darlings Les Savy Fav wrote for their turn on Yo Gabba Gabba. We were jealous of all of the scooters and snacks at Google’s New York HQ. We mouthed along with the top 100 quotes from The Wire. We remembered the 7 shortest running sitcoms of all time. We wondered if having Jay-Z and the Smiths (as in Will and Jada Pinkett) producing Broadway’s Fela! will guarantee it’s a smash. We were excited to read that Chuck is coming back in January. We followed a purple vintage brocade jacket across the country. We watched Lady Gaga’s “Bad Romance” video as soundtracked by Skinny Puppy. And finally, we saluted Pink Floyd’s The Wall. The album — which inspired the film still above — turns 30 this month.

1. Fox’s Sarah Connor Chronicles has been officially canceled. Ditto for CBS’s Without a Trace and ABC’s The Unusuals. On a positive note, Chuck lives. [via ABC]

2. “Robert Draper’s GQ piece on Donald Rumsfeld being called out by former colleagues, they’re running covers of his White House morning defense briefings. You have to see these.” Yes, you do. [via Gawker]

3. Indie music lovin’ news anchor Brian Williams debuts the unfortunately-named BriTunes, a music interview series on his NBC site with a piece on Deer Tick. [via Spinner]

4. What happens when a “never-nude” dates a sister of the traveling pants? Copious PDA. [via NYP]

5. Lens is the New York Times‘ new photojournalism blog that lets you feel cultured and aware without having to deal with all those exhausting words. [via NYT]

R.I.P. Boston Globe [via Washington Post]

Chuck fans — keep holding your breath [via EW]

$10,000 Yayoi Kusama cell phone [via @RichardMetzger]

More Bolaño: About the phobias in Roberto Bolaño’s 2666 [via The Rumpus]

Cows are shitting bricks. Literally. [via Inhabitat]

New uses: Calling out reporters on Twitter [via NYO]

The Hipster Grifter turns herself in [via Gawker]

Today at Flavorpill, we surprised to discover that Bat for Lashes’ Natasha Khan has an alien altergo. Do you think Radiohead knew about it when they invited her on tour? We eyeballed this year’s pretty finalists for best magazine design. But what in the heck is onEarth? We daydreamed about taking a tour of Ben Afffleck and Jennifer Garner’s pricey new LA home. We were happy to hear that Spike Lee’s Passing Strange adaptation had been picked up by PBS at Tribeca. Now we can watch the rock musical at home! We realized that thanks to the swine flu epidemic, we’ll probably have to wait even longer to see the most delayed apocalypse movie of all time, The Road. We were proud of our fellow geeks for using their geek smarts to try and save NBC’s Chuck. Although we’re not sure it’s enough… We loved the irony of Devo’s Mark Mothersbaugh getting fired from Drew Barrymore’s upcoming film, Whip It! (Come back on Monday for an interview with the screenwriter.) And finally, we’ll send you off with this image of the “F*cking Hipster Cat.” We once dated a guy with those exact frames.

The buzz on Vulture last week regarding 30 Rock‘s McFlurrygate — Tina, for the record, insists that they received no money from the McDonald’s Corporation — got us thinking about over-the-top product placement in our favorite TV shows. Or maybe it was this depressing article in The Atlantic about how we’re spiraling toward a future where Procter & Gamble will lease prime time space on network TV, just like in olden times. Either way, we’ve had the future of network television on the brain, and while we’re willing to take Tina for her word, we’ve noticed that NBC seems to be dealing with economic uncertainty by blurring the lines between church and state.

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In case you haven’t noticed, it has been an extremely slow day in an extremely slow week for cultural news (blame it on the fact that most publicists get Christmas to New Year’s Day off). Luckily, we just stumbled upon an exciting gem — Michael Ausiello’s last-minute best of TV 2008 list on EW.com. It’s just in time and it’s chock full of surprises! And shout outs to The Shield! And Ugly Betty! And there’s no Tina Fey anywhere! It’s crazy! (Sorry, too much caffeinating in preparation for tonight’s festivities.)

Before we spoil all the fun, check out his expert picks, along with our common man commentary in bold, after the jump.

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