Fox News

Praise Jesus, Kirk Cameron Is ‘Saving Christmas’ From You Dirty Liberal Atheists

Look, I know you get tired of hearing about it, but it’s true — it happens earlier and earlier, every single year. Why, it’s not even Labor Day yet, we’re still wearing age-inappropriate short pants, the kids are barely back in school, and already, four months before the big day… it’s time to start complaining about the War on Christmas. Can we just get put away the “Halloween is a Satanist celebration” protest signs first? Where are our priorities in this hopelessly paranoid, Christian conservative nation? Anyway, Kirk Cameron — remember him? The Growing Pains heartthrob whose warm, dreamy smile filled a thousand issues of Tiger Beat and as many late-‘80s junior high lockers, before he started railing about evolution and bananas and how gays are destroying civilization, and everyone sort of backed away from him slowly, like some kind of ranting, drooling homeless guy on the subway? Anyhoo, he’s made a fairly good living from the “faith-based” entertainment industry, so this week, he sat down with Glenn Beck’s The Blaze website, which in turn shared the trailer to his latest cinematic opus, Saving Christmas. … Read More

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‘The Daily Show’, Fox News, and Ferguson: The Dangers of an Alternate News Reality

Unlike the regular news shows it began skewering and ended up, for many, supplanting, The Daily Show goes on vacation. They time these breaks carefully — over holidays, or during stretches of the summer (like, say, mid-August) when news usually isn’t happening. It didn’t time out that way this year. The Daily Show aired on August 7 and then went on a two-and-a-half week hiatus; on August 9, Michael Brown was shot and killed in Ferguson, Missouri. As that shock over that shooting gave way to protests, tear gas, police militarization and threats, looting, and general horror, those of us who increasingly look to Stewart and company for a bit of levity and/or indignation had to wait. Last night, Stewart returned, with a reminder that while alums Colbert and Oliver may give TDS a run for their money in the social/political satire department, Stewart’s program remains untouchable in the area of fierce, stinging media commentary. … Read More

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Fox News Boldly Investigates the Shameful Trend of “Female Breadwinners”

Here’s a fun game you can play the next time watch Fox & Friends — though, and I cannot stress this enough, you really should only be watching Fox & Friends to play this game or for other satirical purposes, as it’s a program with the net effect of an aluminum bat to the forehead, intellectually speaking. The game is called “Sure! If You’re a Fucking Idiot!,” and it goes like this: every time one of the Fox bobbleheads poses one of their “just asking!” questions, cheerfully reply, “Sure! If you’re a fucking idiot!” And then change the channel. (You can also play this game during most of Fox’s programming.) And on yesterday’s F&F, they posed this humdinger: “Are female breadwinners a problem?” … Read More

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‘NY Post’s’ Kyle Smith and Fox News’ Greg Gutfeld Blame Young Liberals for Making Them Uncool

Good news, hate-readers: between writing screeds against women in Hollywood and non-review movie reviews, The New York Post’s Kyle Smith went and read him a book. Not even a picture book, either — one with words and everything! Alas, those words were written by Fox News host Greg Gutfeld, and the book is all about how us liberal hipsters took over the currency of cool from hard-working conservatives. In true Smith form, he doesn’t actually review the book; he merely parrots its talking points and lazily reappropriates the book’s title (Not Cool: The Hipster Elite and Their War on You) into his headline (“The hipster war on you: How liberals use cool as a weapon”). Not that I’m complaining; it saves the trouble of actually having to read Gutfeld’s tome. Let’s see what these two middle-aged white dudes are angry about now! … Read More

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Bill O’Reilly Driven Crazy by ‘Between Two Ferns’ and Beyoncé

Fox News and Bill O’Reilly are, at this point in modern television, low-hanging fruit. If you want to find someone who adeptly creates outrage out of nothing, look no further than O’Reilly. Despite trying to rebrand himself as a popular historian in recent years with his books about the deaths of Jesus, Lincoln, and JFK, he has always made a career out of being angry at whatever popular left-leaning folks — from President Obama to George Clooney — are doing. The guy is easily offended, at least for the sake of good TV, and in turn creates controversy to piss off the people who hate-watch him. It’s a vicious circle, indeed, and this week he’s found his typical ire in the familiar (Obama) and the unexpected (Beyoncé). … Read More

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