Everyone knows that the holidays are a time for tradition, so here’s one of Flavorwire‘s long-time favorites: doling out gifts to some of contemporary culture’s biggest and boldest icons. Whether they’re dead or alive, naughty or nice, whether they’ve been a cultural touchstone for five decades or five minutes — everyone deserves presents this time of year, right? So with that in mind, click through to find the perfect gift for the Miley Cyrus, Joss Whedon, or J-Law in your life. You know you’ve got… Read More
I have a confession to make. This is tough, but it’s important for me to be truthful about it to my colleagues, my family, my readers… and most of all, myself. Here goes: I am a serial killer.
Whew. Feels good to get that off my chest.
I didn’t realize it, of course. I guess when you’re truly sick, you don’t know; it all seems normal to you. I was just going through my daily life, doing my job, caring for my loved ones, engaging in what seemed to me a perfectly average, everyday routine. But then I saw this video of Lone Ranger stars Jonny Depp and Armie Hammer and producer Jerry Bruckheimer talking about what I, and people like me, had done to their precious baby: … Read More
Every year, Forbes releases its lists of Hollywood’s highest-paid actors and actresses, presumably to give schoolteachers and cops and social workers an opportunity to think a little harder about their choices. This week saw the release of the ten highest-paid actresses list, topped by Angelina Jolie at $33 million a year. Putting aside the rather glaring issues of gender pay — that top $33 million paycheck would barely land Jolie in the top ten of male actors — here’s a question: Angelina Jolie? Seriously? Angelina Jolie hasn’t appeared in a movie since 2010. (The year, not the forgotten 2001 sequel.) That film, The Tourist, is mostly remembered these days as the punchline for Golden Globes stories. It made a little bit of money, but certainly not enough that its leading lady should still be coasting on it. Yet this year’s Forbes lists are mostly interesting as confirmation of what we’ve been suspecting for a while: that movie stars don’t matter anymore. … Read More
Here at Flavorwire, we do our level best to engage in rational, reasoned, thoughtful criticism. But there are elements of our culture that are simply out of our analytical grasp: the films, music, authors, television shows, etc. that we hate with no reasonable explanation. Welcome to Irrational Hatred Week, in which your Flavorwire staffers share what we loathe in a variety of media, and do our best to figure out why. Today’s Irrational Hatred topic: movies. … Read More
Lest you think its fate wasn’t already sealed by its widely reported first weekend belly flop, The Lone Ranger was crushed last weekend, landing in fifth place with a measly $11 million. Those are some pretty miserable numbers for the passion project of a major movie star like Johnny Depp, but if you’d like to know exactly how bad things are going for Mr. Depp, consider this: Deadline is reporting that he’s in final talks to return as the Mad Hatter in the sequel to Disney’s horrifying yet inexplicably successful 2010 version of Alice in Wonderland. This is in addition to his already announced fifth go-round as Captain Jack Sparrow in yet another Pirates of the Caribbean movie. You guys, Johnny Depp must be stopped. … Read More
Disney’s big-budget adaptation of The Lone Ranger bit the big one at the box office last weekend, taking in less than $50 million and ensuring a healthy loss for movie that cost at least five times that. Plenty of theories for its tanking have been bandied about, here and elsewhere: Depp’s star is falling, young audiences are unfamiliar with the character, Westerns are always a hard sell. But here’s one more thought: maybe it’s because word got around that The Lone Ranger ran a befuddlingly inflated 149 minutes, and viewers couldn’t imagine sitting through a summer action movie that was that goddamn long. But it’s not like The Lone Ranger is the sole offender — especially in recent years, more and more filmmakers are pushing their luck with bloated running times that test viewers’ patience and indicate producers and editors falling down on the… Read More
After a protracted production period, a series of cancellations and restarts, and a lengthy conversation over racism and representation, Disney’s big-budget, big-screen adaptation of The Lone Ranger landed in theaters over the holiday weekend, and the results weren’t pretty. Its five-day domestic gross was a mere $48.9 million (with just under $30 million more coming in from foreign markets), meaning that the Mouse House is going to take a real bath on the picture — its budget was somewhere in the neighborhood of $250 million, and that’s before its substantial marketing and distribution costs. As The Hollywood Reporter notes, that means we’re only halfway into summer movie season, but we’ve already seen three very high-profile belly flops. What’s going wrong? … Read More
The new reboot of the classic radio serial and television Western The Lone Ranger is out today, and much of the conversation has centered on the casting of Caucasian (with some Indian somewhere in his background — promise!) actor Johnny Depp in the role of Native American sidekick/stereotype Tonto. Unfortunately, it’s just the latest example of a white actor playing a character of color — though Depp can take some comfort in the fact that his portrayal isn’t nearly as offensive as some of those that came before him. … Read More
The important question, when you get right down to it, is why the hell they wanted to make The Lone Ranger in the first place. It’s not like anyone was clamoring for it, or that there’s some kind of built-in brand recognition. This is a character still best known from a ‘30s radio serial and a ‘50s television show (his most recent big-screen incarnation, 1981’s The Legend of the Lone Ranger, was a notorious boondoggle), so the audience that might be interested is, it seems, just about the right age to have no desire whatsoever to sit through a two-and-a-half-hour Johnny Depp summer blockbuster. It’s not like rebooting the Superman or Spider-Man franchise, perpetual favorites of lucrative young moviegoers and fanboys. But more than that, those characters don’t come with any of the loaded racial iconography that a 2013 film adaptation must contend with. The fumbling of that issue isn’t the sole undoing of Gore Verbinski’s new movie — there’s plenty of other flaws — but it sure doesn’t help. … Read More