Salute Your Shorts

The 9 Best Insults from '90s Kids' TV Shows

Nineties kids’ TV shows had way sassier insults than any other decade, and we’re here to highlight the best of the best. Name calling? Check. Inappropriate “whore” puns? Double check. After the jump, we’ve unearthed ten classic zingers from Boy Meets WorldSalute Your ShortsClarissa Explains it All, and more. Of course, some shows had more wisecracks than others (here’s looking at you, Pete & Pete), but we’ve done our best to gather nine great one-liners from nine nostalgia-inducing live action series. Check ‘em out after the jump, and feel free to insult us in the comments using the insults we missed. … Read More

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’90s Teen TV Characters: Where Are They Now?

All your friends are getting married. Some of them are having kids. And now, in case you didn’t already feel like an overgrown child whose life is passing him by, Cory Matthews and Topanga Lawrence have a preteen daughter. Yes, for the past week, the internet has been abuzz with the news that a Boy Meets World sequel is in the works. Called Girl Meets World, it will focus on young Riley Matthews and her “edgy friend,” Maya. While we’re not sure that revisiting ABC’s TGIF lineup is the best idea, the update on Cory and Topanga has made us wonder what some of our other favorite ’90s teen TV characters might be up to in 2012. After the jump, we check in on (by which we mean, “we imagine”) what they’ve done since last we saw them. … Read More

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Flavorpill’s Guide to Mythical Vacations

When you need to get away from reality, sometimes leaving your hometown doesn’t get you far enough. Fortunately, that place just outside reality, the place that exists only on celluloid, in books, and in our minds, is home to some of the most seductive vacation spots with the power to transport you into another world entirely.

It’s also where the worst of purgatories reside, so you won’t want to get too deeply lost in that vast vortex of imagination; we wouldn’t want you to spend your two weeks off stumbling through H.P. Lovecraft’s foreboding Arkham, nor would we recommend traveling all the way to the Little Prince’s B-612, which, other than a vain rose, a few small volcanoes, and some weed-like plant life, doesn’t have too much to offer visitors. We’ve gotten lost in bad books and movies and comic books before, too, so we’ve put together a selective insider’s Baedeker to only the very best imaginary vacation spots we wish we could visit. Follow our guide, below the jump, and tell us where else you would go. … Read More

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Why Resurrecting ’90s Nickelodeon Is a Bad Idea: A Polemic

There are some opinions that are so unpopular to express that they’re essentially one-way tickets to social exile. Hating baby animals, for one. Wishing cookies were never invented. Thinking Gigli is a good movie. Today, though, I bite my tongue no longer on one of the big ones.

After the announcement that Nickelodeon is resurrecting All That, The Amanda Show, and a few other classics for late-night reruns, I’m coming out with my true feelings: the celebratory orgy for this revival is misguided. Nineties Nickelodeon shows were good fun and all, but bringing them back could destroy the value they have left for the current, 20-something generation of couch potatoes. After the jump, check out three key reasons why resurrecting ’90s Nick is a bad idea, and feel free to relieve your daily tomato-pelting urges in the comments. … Read More

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’90s Nickelodeon Stars: Where Are They Now?

[Editor's note: Flavorwire is counting down our most popular features of 2010. This post comes in at position number 3It was originally published June 3, 2010.] It’s been a nostalgic week for us at Flavorpill. A post devoted to ten child stars to follow on Twitter got us thinking about what ever happened to all the kid actors we used to love on classic Nickelodeon shows. Are the All That kids still comedians? Does the Roundhouse gang still sing and dance? What are Alex Mack and Sam from Clarissa Explains It All up to in 2010? Remember Hey Dude? After the jump, we answer all those questions and many, many more. … Read More

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Mixtape: ’90s Nickelodeon Themes

There’s something about TV theme songs: Although they aim to be timeless, in retrospect they’re always a relic of their era. Perhaps that’s why they make us so nostalgic. So, when we stumbled upon this great playlist of songs from Seinfeld, featuring the show’s own quirky, bouncy, bubbly intro, it got us thinking about all the other ’90s TV themes we haven’t heard since, well, the ’90s. Over the next few days, we’ll be posting mixtapes of themes from some of that period’s most memorable programming blocks. Today, we’re kicking it off with a compilation of great ’90s Nickelodeon music, which you can listen to after the jump. Oh, and if you’re curious about what ever happened to the casts of these shows, check out our recent update on what they’re doing now. … Read More

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