Celebrity book deals practically exist to piss us off. While there are certainly exceptions to the rule (such as the recent, glowingly reviewed tomes by Jay-Z and Steve Martin, as well as Patti Smith’s National Book Award-winning memoir), most stars just aren’t writers. And few things are more annoying — especially for those of us who write for a living, or have aspirations of doing so — than the news that a functionally illiterate reality TV star is preparing to “write” a memoir, children’s book, or novel. After the jump, we take a look at the year’s most irritating examples, from the Salahis to Snooki.
Susan Boyle
Curious about what Boyle, who rose to fame as the frumpy 47-year-old virgin with a beautiful voice, has been doing all her life? We aren’t, but that didn’t stop British publisher Transworld from handing the singer a deal to write the memoir The Woman I Was Born to Be about the making of an unlikely diva. As she said in a statement, “When I strutted on to the stage for that audition, I was a scared wee lassie, still grieving for my mother, not caring how I looked. I think I’ve grown up a lot in the last year, become more of a lady, and I’m not so frightened anymore.” Okay, we stopped reading after “wee lassie,” but — “wee lassie”! There is someone in the world who actually talks like this! Sold.
Comments (13)
[...] Flavorwire [...]
Tyra’s series of YA books sound remarkably like the ALPHAS series…
Tony Blair’s autobiography didn’t make the grade? Unless by “Here’s the Situation” you meant all irrelevant biographies. (Still can’t believe that’s real.)
[...] This piece on the year’s most disturbing celebrity book deals taught me that Paul, The (Late) Psychic Octopus, has a book deal. THIS RAISES SO MANY QUESTIONS. [...]
Does she get naked ? Would love to see that..
There are lots of people who talk like that – we are called Scots :)
“I plan on making my book one of the revolution’s catalysts,” just like The Turner Diaries, except with witches.
Yes, there are many in the world who say “wee lassie” and use other colloquialisms. Whats the problem? Doesnt invalidate the value of what they say.
What? No mentions of Caribou Barbie’s God, Mother and Country tome?
[...] won a National Book Award, Stephen King returned to the art of taut, disturbing short stories, and a whole slew of celebrities released tripe we’d rather not get into [...]
[...] deal, a straight autobiography just doesn’t cut it anymore. Fortunately, as the number of gratuitous celebrity bios has increased, so too has the originality of books by the writers who are actual professionals in [...]
I just can’t understand how people like snookie, Kim Kardashian, and Mike The Situaction is getting book deals just off of there fame But people like me (Isiah Hurts) have to go independent cause we lack the fame. But ebooks becoming big so maybe more real authors (Laliana Knowles) can get on a major level
[...] we mentioned here before, one of the most disturbing celebrity book deals of 2010 involved Jersey Shore star Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi being paid to write (pretend to [...]
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