10 Inappropriate Literary Character Crushes

Our friends at HuffPost recently put together a fascinating list of the literary characters their readers find sexiest. What we found most interesting weren’t the obvious picks — Mr. Darcy, Casanova — but the number of odd choices. James Joyce’s Stephen Dedalus? We’re pretty sure he wasn’t supposed to be terribly attractive. And Victor Mancini from Chuck Palahniuk’s Choke? Really? We puzzled over the piece for a while before concluding that lust works in mysterious ways. “The heart wants what it wants” is a cliché for a reason. So, in that spirit, we’ve created a necessarily subjective list of unlikely literary crushes. From stalwart, seemingly asexual supporting characters to all-out weirdos to evil incarnate, ten book characters we find improbably sexy are after the jump. Confess yours in the comments.

Tilda Swinton as Orlando

Orlando from Virginia Woolf’s Orlando: A Biography

We emphatically co-sign HuffPost’s inclusion of Orlando on their list. Along with mythological prophet Tiresias, this Elizabethan gentleman who lives for hundreds of years and eventually wakes up transformed into a woman is among literature’s most famous transsexuals. Orlando is sexy — and gets a lot of action — as both a guy and a lady, appealing to our well-developed appreciation for androgyny. It certainly doesn’t hurt that Tilda Swinton played the character in Sally Potter’s excellent film version.