F. Scott Fitzgerald’s Odd Tips for Using Leftover Turkey

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He may be known as one of literature’s preeminent party boys, but F. Scott Fitzgerald was apparently no slouch as a homemaker, either. The Crack-Up, a collection of his essays, letters, and other ephemera, includes the author’s extensive list of recipes for the leftover turkey that results from various seasonal feasts. “At this post holiday season, the refrigerators of the nation are overstuffed with large masses of turkey, the sight of which is calculated to give an adult an attack of dizziness,” he explained by way of introduction. “It seems, therefore, an appropriate time to give the owners the benefit of my experience as an old gourmet, in using this surplus material.”

Every entry is, er, imaginative, but this one may be our favorite: “Turkey Remnant: This is one of the most useful recipes for, though not, ‘chic,’ it tells what to do with the turkey after the holiday, and how to extract the most value from it. Take the remnants, or, if they have been consumed, take the various plates on which the turkey or its parts have rested and stew them for two hours in milk of magnesia. Stuff with moth-balls.” Visit Lists of Note to see the rest of Fitzgerald’s whimsical (and often, frankly, racist) recipes.