There ain’t no boyfriend like a ’90s TV boyfriend, are we right or are we right? For some reason or another, they don’t make ’em like they used to. Is Puck our new A.C. Slater? Is Tim Riggins our new Jordan Catalano? It’s safe to say that while their 21st-century equivalents are attractive enough, the original guys are irreplaceable, so we’ve ranked some one-of-a-kind ’90s TV boyfriends from worst to best, because — well, why not? Don’t be alarmed when you don’t see any adults on this list — recounting the many lost loves of Jerry Seinfeld sounds exhausting, so we’re sticking to teenagers. Check ’em out after the jump, and hit the comments to let us know which Savage brother you prefer.
10. The Worst Boyfriend — Jordan Catalano, My So-Called Life
One cannot merely say the words, “Jordan Catalano”; one must sigh the words, “Jordan Catalano.” So, if TV were real life, we wouldn’t be caught dead speaking ill of — sigh — Jordan Catalano. You know, just in case he wanted us to, um, tutor him in the boiler room, or whatever. That being said, let’s put aside our fluttery inner 16-year-old and face the obvious truth: Jordan Catalano was a pretty terrible boyfriend. Sure, he was in a band, he was gorgeously aloof, and he was Jared Leto before Jared Leto became Jared Leto, but when push came to shove, Angela Chase should’ve gone with Brian Krakow from the get-go. Wow, we can’t believe we actually typed that. Is this adulthood?