Every Friday here at Flavorwire, we like to gather up the week’s new movie trailers, give them a look-see, and rank them from worst to best — while taking a guess or two about what they might tell us (or hide from us) about the movies they’re promoting. This week’s seven new trailers do not feature Lindsay Lohan or Will and Jaden Smith — you’ll soon see why we find that so strange. Check ’em all out after the jump, and share your thoughts in the comments.
The Canyons
We’re assuming that this Bret Easton Ellis-penned film might look less like a supercut of boring scenery shots from The Hills if its star — Lindsay Lohan — actually showed up in the teaser. Then again, maybe not.
After Earth
What’s with releasing actor-free teasers this week? We can’t honestly say that we were anxiously awaiting our first look at M. Night Shyamalan’s latest, which stars Will and Jaden Smith. But this? It’s like one of those fake educational videos that you were forced to watch as a kid at Epcot. No thank you.
Jayne Mansfield’s Car
For a film featuring such a stacked cast (Robert Duvall, Billy Bob Thornton, John Hurt, Kevin Bacon, and Frances O’Connor), a pleasing time period (the 1960s), a potentially charming premise (the cultural clash between a group of Southerners and Brits), and a talented director (Thornton, who also co-wrote the screenplay), you’d think that the trailer for this family drama would be more exciting. This is Thornton’s first return to the writer-director chair in over a decade. We should really want to see it. But we don’t. That would probably explain why there’s no release date yet here in the US.
The Campaign
This isn’t the first trailer we’ve seen for this Will Ferrell/Zach Galifianikis political comedy, and it’s mostly more of the same, but it did make us laugh out loud a handful of times, so we’re including it here. Fingers crossed that when this one hits theaters next month, we discover that they’ve been holding out on revealing the funniest material.
Sound City
If the idea of watching a bunch of musicians geek out over recording equipment and wax rhapsodic about sound quality isn’t your idea of a good time, then you’ll probably want to skip this documentary produced and directed by Dave Grohl. For those of you who fantasize about visiting the studio where acts like Fleetwood Mac, Neil Young, and Tom Petty recorded some of their most famous albums, well, this might be the next best thing.
Grabbers
How’s this for an entertaining premise: a seaside village is being plagued by blood-sucking sea monsters that have only one weakness — they’re allergic to alcohol. Obviously not for everyone, but Jon Wright’s horror comedy was popular with many filmgoers at Sundance, and from this delightfully raucous trailer, it’s easy to see why.
The Master
We’ve posted a handful of beautifully-shot teasers for Paul Thomas Anderson’s new movie over the past few months, but today brings the first official trailer for the film — which notably, finally gives us our real glimpse at the whole Scientology-inspired plotline (“Good science by matter of definition allows for a difference of opinion, otherwise you merely have the will of one man, which is the basis of cult.” Indeed!). What more is there to say, really? Between the breathtaking camerawork and the promise of fantastic performances from Philip Seymour Hoffman and Joaquin Phoenix, we can’t wait for this one, and everything that we see only makes us more excited for it to hit theaters in October.