And only a guy (and a moronic one at that) would classify Ghostbusters as a “guy comedy”; your mileage may vary, but in my experience, women love that film just as much as men, and there certainly isn’t some sort of alienating factor that makes it a “guys-only” movie. But that distinction is vital for the most amusing portion of Fleming’s anti-Ghost-girl-busters argument: the inevitable “what’s next?” tangent. Please note: nothing intelligent or reasonable ever comes out of a “what’s next” sidebar. It has been taken over by the “What’s next? Marrying dogs?” wing of the anti-marriage equality unit, and is thus intellectually bankrupt.
So after grudgingly acknowledging that “we are seeing a recognition that women will come to the movies if there is something in it for them” and listing examples like The Hunger Games, Divergent, and Lucy, we get to the heart of the matter, with a bit of presumably jokey candor that doesn’t undercut the weird sexism and guy-panic at work here:
But does that give them the right to take Ghostbusters from knuckle-dragging Neanderthals like me who have little else going for us but our all-time top 10 or 20 favorite guy movies, and the prospect of a revamp that feels like the original guy version of one of the films on that list? What’s next, a Goodfellas redo with female mobsters pulling off the Lufthansa heist? A Raging Bull redo with Rhonda Rousey? Brian’s Song, set in in (sic) the WNBA? Animal House at a sorority? Sony has been looking for the right director since Ivan Reitman told Deadline he’d decided no more ghost busting for him, that he would oversee the revamp as producer but that it was time to hand the torch. This was after the great Harold Ramis passed away.
Setting aside the last two sentences of that paragraph — which seriously read like they were translated to English from another language —I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that no, Mr. Fleming, we probably won’t see female remakes of Goodfellas, Raging Bull, or Brian’s Song, since (and sit down, I’m about to blow your mind) those movies were based on true stories that happened to men so that would be kind of silly. As for Animal House at a sorority, well, I guess you didn’t see The House Bunny.
And as for the notion that a property best known for showcasing the talents of male actors has no business rewriting itself into a vehicle for women: you might not wanna mention that to the dozens of community and regional theaters that do the female version of The Odd Couple every year. There are all sorts of reasons to let the Ghostbusters franchise lie, and we’ve discussed them before: too much time has passed, too much of its magic was rooted in its original moment, too many of the key players aren’t interested, too much of the film smacks of being a “filmed deal,” made solely to generate truckloads of money from goodwill and nostalgia. Those are the reasons we should hope the Feig Ghostbusters never gets past the rumors stage — not some misplaced, bullshit notion that girls can’t play too.