The 50 Best Insults From ‘Veep’ Season 5

In the second-to-last episode of the current season of Veep, Selina tells her daughter Catherine about the time her father took her to a Nixon rally as a child. “Daddy leaned in to me and he said, ‘You know, a lot of people don’t like Nixon, but by God, they respect him. And that’s you, peanut.’”

It’s appropriate that the moment that instigated Selina’s political career — at least in her memory — is a thinly veiled insult. Veep, the sharpest-written comedy on the air, is so full of spectacularly imaginative put-downs it’s a wonder the show’s plot doesn’t collapse under the weight of them all.

We’ve combed through all of Season 5, which ended on Sunday night, for the show’s most creative, stinging slurs. It may not come as a surprise that Selina herself is the character most likely to dispatch a cutting remark — or that those remarks are often targeted at her daughter and her unruly hair. After all, this is a woman whose own mother, upon visiting her daughter in the Oval Office for the first time, had only this to say: “I do hope you’ll wait till your hair grows to have your portrait painted.”

You know what they say — every leader sets a tone. Behold, a compendium of Veep Season 5 insults.

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Selina Meyer on Catherine Meyer

  1. “The only thing Catherine ever finished was an entire ice cream cake.”
  1. “Catherine, why is that your hair?”
  1. “She’s a lesbian, Mike. She’s not a werewolf. Though either one would explain why she never shaves her legs.”
  1. On Catherine’s hair: “What’s happening with these tentacles here? Are they gonna get put away or something?”
  1. On Catherine’s hair, again: “Oh, look Catherine. You fixed that there, didn’t you? Except that it’s still just a rat’s nest in the back.”
  1. “Even labor and delivery with her was a nightmare.”