For centuries, we have judged each other by the books we read. And in the past several decades, we’ve also put people in categories based on their favorite bands. But, in the Internet age, when most of us spend more time staring at Firefox than reading or listening to music, what better way to stereotype people than by teasing meaning out of their favorite website? With that in mind, we present yet another light-hearted list (featuring many websites that we, too, love very much) that will nonetheless piss you off if you take it too seriously.
Slate
That guy at the party who’s always going, “Just to play the devil’s advocate for a second…”
Buzzfeed
Viral Internet addicts who are too young to remember a time when “viral” was primarily a medical term
Gawker
Editorial assistants who hate their bosses and want to write for Gawker
Jezebel
Lady editorial assistants who can’t decide whether they miss Women’s Studies classes or think they were total bullshit
Salon
People who pretend they want to read about lefty politics but actually want to read celebrity gossip
Huffington Post
People who pretend they want to read about lefty politics but actually want to gawk at celebrity nip slips
McSweeney’s
Nice hipsters
Vice
Mean hipsters
Brooklyn Vegan
Mean hipsters with a lot of frustrations to vent
nytimes.com
People who are either killing or subsidizing print media. Take your pick.
Pitchfork
People who see themselves as tastemakers but really prefer to have their tastes made for them
Stereogum
Former Pitchfork fans looking for less talk, more rock
Gorilla vs. Bear
Former Pitchfork fans looking for less rock, more chillwave
The New Yorker
Highbrow types who believe long-form journalism really can thrive on the Internet, goddammit
Fark
Your post-frat buddy who is always sending you some link you’ve already seen a million times
College Humor
Your post-frat buddy who is secretly a big geek
Google
Indecisive types, fanboys with “Don’t be evil” tattoos
Facebook
People whose favorite band is The Beatles
MySpace
People whose favorite band is Ke$ha
Twitter
Media types who have yet to discover the magic of TweetDeck
Neatorama
Adorable nerds who know they’re adorable
Boing Boing
Nerds who would be adorable if they weren’t so obsessed with steampunk
Perez Hilton
Tweens
Oh No They Didn’t
Tween Gossip Girl fans who don’t understand copyright law
YouTube
Tweens who have always wanted to call someone a “fag” but don’t have the guts to do it in person
Hulu
TV fans who haven’t figured out torrents and/or think sitting through the commercials is “supporting the show”
Netflix
That dude who’s always going, “Twelve dollars?! For a movie?! I could watch this at home for pennies!” in line in front of you at the movie theater box office
Fleshbot
That dude in your office who’s always looking around to see if anyone can see his computer screen.
Vulture
ADHD sufferers who love pop culture
Foursquare
Schmoozers whose greatest goal is to be the first result when someone Googles their name
The Awl
Jealous bloggers who are sick of writing SEO headlines
eBay
People who would have been cokeheads in the ’80s
Etsy
Girls who wear hats with cat ears, buy you unidentifiable presents
Flavorwire
Alpha ladies; omega dudes
Comments (23)
Torrents?? Try Rapidshare!
where’s tumblr? It’s for kids who are too young to have had a livejournal. Or who want to think they’re cooler than livejournal…
I like that the link to Vice points to mcsweenys… unintentional awesome.
Rapidshare > torrents? You can’t be serious.
What does the fact that I still regularly update my LiveJournal say about me? Probably nothing positive.
The Vulture one nails it.
hey your linking everyone here so what does that make you?
This post is a lot of fun. Suggestion: Do a post like this for all of the fan boy movie websites that clutter the Internet these days. They all review the same films, post the same production stills and link to the same trailers, usually within minutes or hours of one another.
Livejournal counts if only for Ohnotheydidn’t.
You forgot to put yourself – flavorpill on the list. While these are funny, you are clearly taking a jab at other pop culture news outlets. Without including yourself you couldn’t have more bias journalism – which is a direct stab at your journalistic capabilities.
Actually, Rachel, the blog you’re reading is called Flavorwire, and we put ourselves right at the bottom. Also, while we’re big fans of “journalism” and sometimes even attempt it ourselves, that’s not what we’re calling this post.
this could be so much funnier and less predictable. no-5.
you forgot only one:
ICanHasCheezburger.com – those of us who are either hopelessly twee or not yet tweens
If you guys had actually looked at my Etsy shop, you would have seen that there is only ONE hat with cat ears on it, and that most of my products are all eco-friendly, and that I’ve been donating a percentage of my sales to help save the animals in the gulf coast oil spill. There’s nothing stereotypical about my shop. So by this article are you saying that because I made that one hat with cat ears, and because my hair is multi-colored, that I must be like every other emo/hipster chick on Etsy?
Also, it doesn’t take much skill or intelligence to write an article making fun of people and putting them down. I might suggest to you that you use your talents in a more productive fashion by writing a positive article that might actually do some good or help people.
[...] Stereotyping people by their favorite websites. [...]
Oh I wish “hipster” and “iconic” would go away for a century or so.
[...] nothing bad! Flavorwire has a very funny post about different sites. My favorite description: YouTube, so [...]
Your Etsy picture is my sister. My what a small world we live in.
It’s always funny until it’s about you, taking yourself too seriously and mistaking it for pride is a common foible.
Vice = Hipsters with thinly veiled Daddy problems.
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