The Weirdest Advice from Vintage Lit

Acclaimed Japanese novelist Haruki Murakami can now add “advice columnist” to his list of credentials. As we mentioned earlier this week, Murakami is launching an advice column on a new website called “Mr. Murakami’s Place” (“Murakami-san no tokoro” in Japanese). The news inspires visions of an old-school Dear Abby column — but with more man-eating cats and Norwegian wood. We expect unusual and eloquent words of wisdom from the postmodern author. Advice columns have dished out some pretty strange tips over the years. We’ve collected a few favorites for your perusal. Share any doozies you love, below.

gaycat

If Florida Man became a magazine, this would surely make the cut. We wish Abby asked why they had a pet jaguar, but it’s easy to forget that fact when you reach the “homosexual cat” part of the question.