[Editor’s note: For the next two Fridays, Flavorwire will be counting down our 20 most popular features of 2010. This post, which originally ran on January 19, 2010, comes in at position number 16.] Inspired by Lauren Leto’s “Stereotyping People By Their Favorite Author,” we realized the incredible potential for a mercilessly judgmental list of indie band stereotypes. It is a common fact that Cormac McCarthy readers are men who don’t eat cream cheese, but what about those who listen to The XX on repeat and The Flaming Lips on hallucinogens? They need labels, too. After the jump, in collaboration with contributor Jeff Luppino-Esposito, we lay down the reckless assumptions.
The XX Blog enthusiasts who thought wearing a keffiyeha was awesome.
Passion Pit Bros vaguely interested in listening to music and very interested in having sex with their girlfriend.
The Yeah Yeah Yeahs Girls who bought checkered sneakers in the 8th grade.
Fleet Foxes Hopelessly patchy beard growers.
TV On The Radio Politically-correct hipsters.
Grizzly Bear People who think that world hunger could be assuaged with four part harmonies.
Micachu and the Shapes Chicks with bad teeth.
Wavves Dudes who think low production value is “authentic” and would go down on Todd P.
Steve Aoki Alts who don’t “get” Hipster Runoff.
Joanna Newsom People who have considered befriending a squirrel.
Devendra Banhart People who have considered becoming a squirrel.
Animal Collective Guys who make “Best of the Year” lists in January based predominantly on “feeling.”
The Antlers Boys who enjoy crying more than their girlfriend.
Vivian Girls Girls who purchase a guitar, buy flannel from the Salvation Army, wear glasses that they don’t actually need, and still can’t get the guy.
Vampire Weekend Bros who try to make out with girls at concerts by relating to them via old Nickelodeon shows. “Remember Pete & Pete??”
Death Cab for Cutie Girls who quote lyrics as their Facebook status.
Neon Indian Gorilla Vs. Bear readers.
She & Him People who hate Ben Gibbard.
Bon Iver People with self-esteem issues and probably hate Ben Gibbard.
Washed Out Those who comfortably accept chillwave as a genre.
Memory Tapes Those who comfortably accept chillwave as a lifestyle.
The Shins Premature alts who considered Garden State a life-altering viewing experience.
Radiohead Everyone.
Tegan & Sara Lesbians and guys who firmly believe that when there are two girls on stage together, there is a 63% chance of them making out.
St. Vincent Feminists.
Drake Indie rap fans who thought Tha Carter III was too mainstream.
Ra Ra Riot Girls who got their boyfriends to watch Me and You and Everyone We Know.
Bat for Lashes Girls who wear leggings outside of ’80s-themed parties.
Japandroids Guys who only read Pitchfork for the ratings and haven’t showered in at least two days.
Kimya Dawson Chicks who are described by their girlfriends as “sweet” and “really nice” when guys ask if their friend is hot.
Girls Anyone who thinks The Catcher in Rye is the greatest book of all time.
Kid Cudi Blipsters who still wear neon shoes and smoke pot.
The Flaming Lips Self-actualized bros who grow pot.
Antony and the Johnsons Guys who still cry every time they watch Bambi.
Matt and Kim Closeted Blink-182 enthusiasts.
Here We Go Magic Guys who are ‘over’ Grizzly Bear.
Phoenix People who don’t listen to enough music.
Sufjan Stevens People who believe in two things: Jesus and Juno.
M.I.A. Girls who don’t understand politics.
Regina Spektor Girls who don’t understand boys.
Justice Bros who, at one point in their lives, have tried to grow a mustache.
Arcade Fire Frequent transcendental experience havers.
Deerhunter Avid doodlers.
Wilco Guys who go to concerts to relax.
YACHT Someone who, if presented with the opportunity to join a cult, would most definitely join that cult.
Ratatat Boys who think Ocarina of Time is the greatest game ever made.
Patrick Wolf Gay guys.
CSS Girls who throw up at every party.
Woods Indie dudes who wear beanies and you can see the front of their hair pulled back beneath it.
Spoon Bros who drink shitty beer without ironic intentions.
Dirty Projectors People who like way too many toppings on their pizza.
For more stereotypes, check out Stereotyping People by their Favorite Indie Bands Part 2!